I have been a bit of an insominac lately partly due to heartburn and general discomfort, but also there is so much running through my mind lately. Packing up this apartment, worrying about the move, sadness about leaving this apartment are a few but I also can't help but think about what my life will be like in a month. I am so blessed to have made this far in my pregnancy- I will be officially 8 months (32 weeks) pregnant tomorrow (or today- it is 1:30 am). I have enormous hopes and dreams about these babies and I hope that I will be a good mom who will be patient with them, able to teach them good lessons, and raise them with kindness and appreciation.
I keep thinking about who and where I was 5 years ago and what a different picture my life looked like. I was a single woman living by myself in a great neighborhood in NYC. I could barely afford the apartment i was living in but somehow I managed to still live the life- going out all the time to parties, concerts, great restaurants. I was a free-spirit, fun-loving and a bit on the crazy side (in a good way). I had a really fun group of friends and have stories and memories of them that to this day still makes me smile and laugh.
I've been feeling really nostalgic. I dont know if its because I am completely hormonal or if its my way of mentally preparing myself for this new transition in my life (kind of like "in with the new, out with the old"), but I am really missing that free-spirited woman who existed 5 years ago. Not that my life is so boring now, but it is obviously way more structured than it used to be.
To make things even more ironic, our new apartment is in the same neighborhood as my first apartment in NYC after college. I lived there for 8 years- and now I am moving back with a husband and (hopefully) 2 babies. The magnitude of that thought is overwhelming to me.
Its exciting and utterly terrifying at the same time. No wonder I can't sleep...
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Update on me
Its been a roller coaster these last few weeks.
First of all, the deal to our apartment (that we were supposed to move into in 3 weeks) fell through. The sellers were delaying signing the contract and decided at the 11th hour that they wanted more money. We walked away from the deal with our pride in tact but inside we were freaking out because we have nowhere to live starting the beginning of March. The very next day, our broker sent us a bunch of listings for new apartments and we found one we liked and asked to see it later that day. I fell in love with it- it is brand new floors, brand new appliances, much bigger that the other apartment- master bedroom is enormous (down the road we can put up a wall and build another bedroom its so big). The 2nd bedroom can easily fit 2 cribs, a changing table and room left over for lots of toys. The apt. is a lot more than what we wanted to spend, but we are looking at it as an investment. Things will be tight for a while but we both are so excited and know that we can be comfortable living here and raising our babies for a long time.
We put in an offer and got accepted. We received the contract and we just need to sign it, get our financial papers to the mortgage broker and fingers crossed, be able to move in a few weeks. There is no Co-Op board approval which makes the process so much easier.
This is truly a case of when one door closes, another one opens..
The babies are doing well however, last appointment, it was discovered that my cervix shortened a lot. It went from 3.7 cm to 2.5- I kind of knew this would happen because I feel so much pressure when I walk. Just going from my bed to the bathroom is painful.
So, I am officially on bedrest. Funny, I used to always say I could live in my bed it is so comfy. famous last words... It is hard but I just want these babies to cook for 5-6 more weeks so their lungs will be mature and will be as healthy as possible. I am trying to be good and really taking it easy but knowing there are dirty dishes in the sink makes my skin crawl and I have to wash them.
And.. thankfully, my mom is doing great. She had surgery on her throat- it turned out that it wasn't a tumor, just a beign cyst. She is feeling fine and we are all so incredibly relieved. Now she is really focused and excited to start buying baby stuff for us... squee!
First of all, the deal to our apartment (that we were supposed to move into in 3 weeks) fell through. The sellers were delaying signing the contract and decided at the 11th hour that they wanted more money. We walked away from the deal with our pride in tact but inside we were freaking out because we have nowhere to live starting the beginning of March. The very next day, our broker sent us a bunch of listings for new apartments and we found one we liked and asked to see it later that day. I fell in love with it- it is brand new floors, brand new appliances, much bigger that the other apartment- master bedroom is enormous (down the road we can put up a wall and build another bedroom its so big). The 2nd bedroom can easily fit 2 cribs, a changing table and room left over for lots of toys. The apt. is a lot more than what we wanted to spend, but we are looking at it as an investment. Things will be tight for a while but we both are so excited and know that we can be comfortable living here and raising our babies for a long time.
We put in an offer and got accepted. We received the contract and we just need to sign it, get our financial papers to the mortgage broker and fingers crossed, be able to move in a few weeks. There is no Co-Op board approval which makes the process so much easier.
This is truly a case of when one door closes, another one opens..
The babies are doing well however, last appointment, it was discovered that my cervix shortened a lot. It went from 3.7 cm to 2.5- I kind of knew this would happen because I feel so much pressure when I walk. Just going from my bed to the bathroom is painful.
So, I am officially on bedrest. Funny, I used to always say I could live in my bed it is so comfy. famous last words... It is hard but I just want these babies to cook for 5-6 more weeks so their lungs will be mature and will be as healthy as possible. I am trying to be good and really taking it easy but knowing there are dirty dishes in the sink makes my skin crawl and I have to wash them.
And.. thankfully, my mom is doing great. She had surgery on her throat- it turned out that it wasn't a tumor, just a beign cyst. She is feeling fine and we are all so incredibly relieved. Now she is really focused and excited to start buying baby stuff for us... squee!
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Overwhelmed..
I am sorry this post is a big fat bummer but I am seriously going out of my mind. Let me first just remind myself that I am so happy that my little babies are growing strong and kicking away. I know it will all be worth it in the end when I get to see their little faces, but right now I just need to vent.
I hate sleeping- it has become an olympic sport to sucessfully sleep more than 1-2 hours at a time.
I hate working because I just can not be the employee I used to be and give 110% even though everyone still expects it of me. I work in a small non-profit organization where mostly all of the responsibilities lie on my shoulders. Before, I would stay late just to be able to complete everything. Now, I am just too tired to deal with anything and work keeps piling up and I can't keep up which is stressing me out. And even with a woman coming in part-time to help me out, it is still not enough and the organization still looks to me to get everything done.
We are supposedly moving in a month and I can't even wrap my head around how, let alone unpacking and setting up a new home.
I just have too much on my plate right now, coupled with hormone overload and all I want to do is sit and cry. I am trying so hard to keep a positive and happy outlook but my head is exploding.
And.... my mom just called me to tell me that she may or may not have a tumor in her throat. Doctor needs to do a biopsy in a week. If it is a tumor, she will need surgery and radiation. If it is a cyst, she will need surgery. If its nothing, they will leave it alone.
Calgon, take me away.....
I hate sleeping- it has become an olympic sport to sucessfully sleep more than 1-2 hours at a time.
I hate working because I just can not be the employee I used to be and give 110% even though everyone still expects it of me. I work in a small non-profit organization where mostly all of the responsibilities lie on my shoulders. Before, I would stay late just to be able to complete everything. Now, I am just too tired to deal with anything and work keeps piling up and I can't keep up which is stressing me out. And even with a woman coming in part-time to help me out, it is still not enough and the organization still looks to me to get everything done.
We are supposedly moving in a month and I can't even wrap my head around how, let alone unpacking and setting up a new home.
I just have too much on my plate right now, coupled with hormone overload and all I want to do is sit and cry. I am trying so hard to keep a positive and happy outlook but my head is exploding.
And.... my mom just called me to tell me that she may or may not have a tumor in her throat. Doctor needs to do a biopsy in a week. If it is a tumor, she will need surgery and radiation. If it is a cyst, she will need surgery. If its nothing, they will leave it alone.
Calgon, take me away.....
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
my first baby "purchase"
I belong to the Manhattan Twins Club and they send out daily emails on stuff to sell or looking to buy from other Moms. Yesterday, someone posted that she needs to get rid of her Double Snap N Go- basically it is a frame of a stroller and you snap in 2 car seats to become a twin stroller. It is not terribly expensive, but free is always a good price in my book. I should add- I am Jewish and am not having a shower because we believe it is superstitious to set up a nursey or buy things before the babies are born. I am fully behind that concept, however, I do believe that getting basic stuff that you will need from day 1 is not being superstitious, it is being smart. And again, did I mention that the stroller was free? :)
So we went to the Mom's house and picked up our new stroller. When we walked in, her 2 little twins were playing on the carpet- they had so much stuff! bumbo seats, bouncy seats, exercauser, plush blocks, books, ... And then I saw the gallon trash bag filled with diapers- she told me it was just from this week.
But, they were so cute-they smiled and kicked their little legs and babbled. I can not believe that will be my life in a few months (god willing). We folded the stroller and left it in the trunk of our car. It felt so weird and surreal to have it there and definiately did not feel like it belonged to us. But it is our first thing we now own for our babies.. Wow. Ok, breathe...
So we went to the Mom's house and picked up our new stroller. When we walked in, her 2 little twins were playing on the carpet- they had so much stuff! bumbo seats, bouncy seats, exercauser, plush blocks, books, ... And then I saw the gallon trash bag filled with diapers- she told me it was just from this week.
But, they were so cute-they smiled and kicked their little legs and babbled. I can not believe that will be my life in a few months (god willing). We folded the stroller and left it in the trunk of our car. It felt so weird and surreal to have it there and definiately did not feel like it belonged to us. But it is our first thing we now own for our babies.. Wow. Ok, breathe...
Thursday, January 7, 2010
party all night, sleep all day..
My little twinkies take after me, in my lazy pre-pregnancy, bachlorette days. They love the nightlife- as soon as I settle down and am just about ready to sleep, they start kicking up a storm. The other night it felt like a fist was coming through my belly. During the day, they kick but not as frequently. I dont mind- its so cute.
In other news, we put an offer down for an apartment. I am so excited! The apartment is in my old neighborhood. I already know 2 twin moms who live closeby and another good friend who has 2 kids also lives close by. The most exciting thing about the apartment is that it is 1/2 a block from Riverside park and 4 blocks from Central Park. I can not wait to take lots of walks with the babies. I LOVED these parks. I used to bike, jog, meet friends- so many memories. I can't believe it's been 5 years since I left the neighborhood and now I am coming back with 2 babies. Wow!
As far as my pregnancy, I am 26 weeks and thank god, babies are doing great. They are growing - my last appt. they were up to 1 lb, 6 oz. each. I am feeling good- tired a lot and still have heartburn but I am truly and sincerely happy. My husband and I are so excited for these little ones. I found a pediatrician and will have my first consultation in a month's time.
Tomorrow I go back to the doctor to check on growth and progress. I am almost in my third Trimester!
In other news, we put an offer down for an apartment. I am so excited! The apartment is in my old neighborhood. I already know 2 twin moms who live closeby and another good friend who has 2 kids also lives close by. The most exciting thing about the apartment is that it is 1/2 a block from Riverside park and 4 blocks from Central Park. I can not wait to take lots of walks with the babies. I LOVED these parks. I used to bike, jog, meet friends- so many memories. I can't believe it's been 5 years since I left the neighborhood and now I am coming back with 2 babies. Wow!
As far as my pregnancy, I am 26 weeks and thank god, babies are doing great. They are growing - my last appt. they were up to 1 lb, 6 oz. each. I am feeling good- tired a lot and still have heartburn but I am truly and sincerely happy. My husband and I are so excited for these little ones. I found a pediatrician and will have my first consultation in a month's time.
Tomorrow I go back to the doctor to check on growth and progress. I am almost in my third Trimester!
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Almost 6 months!
Wow! time is flying by!
My little twinkies are doing well. They are moving around a lot and I feel their little kicks more frequently now. My husband felt them too but they are fast little things so he has to keep his hand on my tummy for a while to feel them.
My newest symptom is Braxton-Hicks. Every time I get up from a chair after sitting for a while, or climb stairs, or even just change position I get them. My whole belly gets really tight. Its not painful and does not last long but its just a little scary. As of Friday, my cervix is long and closed at 4 cm which is good. I called my doctor about the BH and just waiting to hear back. I feel like it is just normal with twin pregnancies to get them so early but it still concerns me.
Both babies are measuring right on schedule and growing well. One weighs 1 pound and the other is 15 oz. I got to see a 4D ultrasound photo so I can really see some features on their little faces. One has the cutest chubby cheeks and the other has its hand over its face.
Heartburn still kicks my ass. Doctor told me to start taking Mylanta in my repertoire of heartburn meds, which works well for me at night.
In other news, we got 2 offers on our apartment! One bid came in way lower than we want, and the other bid came a bit less than our asking price. We are currently negotiating and hopefully we will end up with the price we want.
Feeling a little scared and overwhelmed about finding a new place to live, moving, packing and unpacking in the next 2 months. Although we all is done and we are moved in, I am so looking forward to finally decorating the nursery!!! I have so many ideas in mind!
My little twinkies are doing well. They are moving around a lot and I feel their little kicks more frequently now. My husband felt them too but they are fast little things so he has to keep his hand on my tummy for a while to feel them.
My newest symptom is Braxton-Hicks. Every time I get up from a chair after sitting for a while, or climb stairs, or even just change position I get them. My whole belly gets really tight. Its not painful and does not last long but its just a little scary. As of Friday, my cervix is long and closed at 4 cm which is good. I called my doctor about the BH and just waiting to hear back. I feel like it is just normal with twin pregnancies to get them so early but it still concerns me.
Both babies are measuring right on schedule and growing well. One weighs 1 pound and the other is 15 oz. I got to see a 4D ultrasound photo so I can really see some features on their little faces. One has the cutest chubby cheeks and the other has its hand over its face.
Heartburn still kicks my ass. Doctor told me to start taking Mylanta in my repertoire of heartburn meds, which works well for me at night.
In other news, we got 2 offers on our apartment! One bid came in way lower than we want, and the other bid came a bit less than our asking price. We are currently negotiating and hopefully we will end up with the price we want.
Feeling a little scared and overwhelmed about finding a new place to live, moving, packing and unpacking in the next 2 months. Although we all is done and we are moved in, I am so looking forward to finally decorating the nursery!!! I have so many ideas in mind!
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Happy Thanksgiving!
I made my first Thankgiving meal and it was a success! Since my ILs came to us for the holiday we made dinner at our apartment. It was just the 4 of us so we bought a 6 pound turkey- I roasted it with rosemary, thyme, sage, minced garlic and really good olive oil. It came out perfectly moist and juicy! I also made stuffing, homeade cranberry sauce, sweet potatoes, grilled asparagus and key lime pie for dessert. I was so proud of myself!
Things I am thankful for this year:
- My family's and my health
- We were able to afford IVF treatment to get these 2 little sweet babies
-That the 2 babies are growing strong and have stuck with me and got me to 21 weeks!
- my wonderful supporting husband who I love to pieces even though he drives me nuts sometimes
- my loving family and friends
I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving!!
Things I am thankful for this year:
- My family's and my health
- We were able to afford IVF treatment to get these 2 little sweet babies
-That the 2 babies are growing strong and have stuck with me and got me to 21 weeks!
- my wonderful supporting husband who I love to pieces even though he drives me nuts sometimes
- my loving family and friends
I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving!!
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